These six certainly think so. Meet your first six Master Chefs. From left to right you have Jimmy Bradley, Ana Sortun, Tony Mantuano, Susan Feniger, Govind Armstrong and Jerry Traunfeld. Only one has been a judge on previous seasons of Top Chef and that's Govind. Will that experience help him or hurt him?
The chefs are immediately paired up to produce their Quickfire dishes which they will be serving to a band I've never heard of, The Bravery. She That Does Not Eat (hostess Kelly Choi) tells the chefs to get into their Pimpmobiles (Lexus) to shop "..at a Chinatown establishment that serves hundreds of people every day." Here's Reason #1 of Why I Love Top Chef Masters: They mess with the Master Chefs heads. From the very first season of Top Chef, the contestants bitterly complain about the insane challenges and how they have no basis in the real world of restaurant cooking. To which I say, shut the hell up all ready, it's freakin' reality TV, you whores. At least the TC Masters know better than complain when their best laid plans of shopping in Chinatown are cruelly dashed on the sharp Doritos laden edges of this gas station.
BWHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAH. The Gas Station challenge. Excellent. You've got James Beard award winners trying to make a gourmet dish from minimart food. Talk about whacking that ego down a bit. Still gotta hand it to Govind for going for the Cheetos.
You never know Frito Lay might come a'calling for a little cross promotional tie in?
(This is just creepy)
Look, I know it's LA but really? Clamato in a Chinatown minimart? I'm sure it's pushing Red Bull right out of the cold cases. And two chefs thought it was a good component for a dish.
Back at the kitchen, Jimmy discovers his purveyor has mistakenly delivered the Heirloom Flaming Hot Red Cheetos Puffs instead of the Classic Orange Crunchy Cheetos that he ordered. Not that it will stop the team from making Mac and Cheetos and Grilled Slim Jims.
Again, work the cross promotion. Slim Jim = ConAgra.
Their 45 minutes of cooking time ticks off the clock and it's time for She Who Does Not Eat to serve the results to the Bravery which is a perfect name for these poor guys considering what they are about to eat.
Folks, this stuff may taste halfway decent but it's some of the ugliest food I've seen on both regular Top Chef and TC Masters. You have been warned.
Folks, this stuff may taste halfway decent but it's some of the ugliest food I've seen on both regular Top Chef and TC Masters. You have been warned.
For some strange reason they start off with Susan and Tony's Bread Pudding.
Next is the very scary Cheetos Mac and Grilled Slim Jim.
Next up? Romance is in the air.
19 comments:
Haha what you do with this is so much better than the show could possibly be. LOL
Yay! Shamu's snarkin' Top Chef Masters. I had to TIVO this but will watch during my morning workout.
Sham, first and foremost, I can't stanz that James Oselan. La Diva just wants to slap him and say, "Are you for real, queen?!"
I can see why you love Susan so much, she's full of energy and downright wacky! I am loving this show because for me it really takes me into their world, you can't really see their personalities from cookbooks alone, now can you? This show, if it's done anything for me, has familiarized me with the great chefs of this country.
Having said that, are they so far removed from shopping like normal people that they can't even tell the diff between reg. cheetos and flamin' hot cheetos? A huge thwap in the head to Govind and DUH!
I used to work at Spiaggia cafe when it first opened in Chicago years ago....I must have been 20. (eek!) Hmmm...Chef Tony doesn't look the same, I didn't even recognize him but his wife Catherine does. (I think her name was Catherine?)
Oh and something me and DJ Nevah L8 were cracking up over: Govind's comment about the band: Who are they anyway? We didn't know either! ANd....La Diva noticed that their bad hair styles represented each decade! the boy in the hat was from the 80's, the boy with the quif from the 50's, the other boy looked like a not as cute Jim Morrison from the late 60's and that dreadful shaved side with the ponytail reeks of the 90's! In any case, I found them boring and loved the comment: "Let's listen to their new album and review THEM!" Haha!
Gawd, I sure could go for some hearty, thick pasta stuffed with a light taleggio, how about you?!
LaDiva, I can take Oselan, it's Gael I'm not really digging. That she bedded Elvis and has a hat fetish is not enough for me to climb up on the Gael Bandwagon.
I do loves me some Susan Feniger. I love that she tried wooing her eventual girlfriend with her best dishes and when that failed, went to plan B and started making her drinks.
Govind and the other chefs comments about the band had me laughing too but for a different reason. Nobody likes a critic whether it be a rock band on the road alot or the food critic for the NY Times. And don't give me that "it hurts our bottom line" bullshit, those band guys were critiquing food you will never make again and still the chefs got pissy. That's the bigger point some of these chefs miss, you can't pick your customers.
I like Susan's personality. If good food doesn't get the girl, try drinks instead. lol.
Dani, she would have had me with the food.
She That Does Not Eat (hostess Kelly Choi.)
Funniest thing I've heard all day.
And that Cheeto dish? Shiver. Everyone knows Fiery Cheetos are an abomination against God.
Moi, it certainly looked rather hideous. I'm trying to imagine the chemical reaction of combining Flamin' Hot Cheetos with Kraft Mac and Cheese. I'm thinking Hazmat Suit Dangerous.
OK! I can see the pics of the contestants now! Woot! Can I pleeeez vote for the orange high tops, I mean the chef in the orange high tops???? Is that a person worth voting for? Cause I reallyreallyreally like the high tops.
Note to Moi: I do like some things that are not Crocs. Ha.
Note to Shamu: I understand that shoes do not cook. Nevertheless. Orange high tops. I ask you.
Orange High Tops would be Susan Feniger and yes, that would be an excellent choice. Better for you if they were pink high top but orange will do.
I adore high tops in any color. Ha!
Moi, you and I agree on so many things I shudder to think about what trouble we'll get into next week! haha!
Shamy, I like Susan's wooing tactics too! But still, that James O, he just picks everything apart! I bet he has one of those homes that is perfect without a single thing out of its place.
Chefs getting pissy is one of the MAIN reasons I tend to not like to work with some of them, they are egomaniacs. And I'm talking about in the real world of chefs I worked with in kitchens more than the TV chefs. I got along with most of them famously but at times their egos and behaviour were hard to take. Yes, good food is important and making good food is a nice gig. But it ain't savin' lives or curing cancer so lighten up!
Been to Govind's restaurant when I lived in L.A. expensive comfort food. His 8 Oz. Burger is two blocks away, the lamb burger tasted like beef their competition, recently opened Burger and Beef Joint is slammin'.
I keep failing to mention how much I love Govind as Slim Jim!!!!
I'm not sure Govind would feel the same.
By the way, I totally agree with you on the ego driven chefs, it's entertainment not fire fighting. I love anyone who does what they love doing with passion but not at the expense of humiliating someone else.
I caint take all the TC drama--the inane gagatha wear, an' whiney snivels--arrrghh!
But j'adore Shamu's commentary--really Shamy, ya could have a career at this--
An' She Who Does Not Eat is falling down funny.
oh...BTW, has anybody seen that Crocs now make maryjanes? Is nuthin' sacred? What happens when crocs make high tops???
When Crocs make high tops, it's time for Moi to lock 'n' load.
Croc high tops? Be still my heart. Bwahahaha
Wait. Am I agreeing with Moi on something shoe-related? Damn. This is probably not the time to confess that I bought (and love) some Borns...
Shamy! Pink high tops! Gah! Too! Much! Pink! Haha Ok so my pick of the chefs is the gal who won her gal with food and wine. EXCELLENT. I shall follow her career with considerable interest.
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