Friday, September 24, 2010

The Cray Cray Train

seth's kitchen

Hi, I'm Seth and Welcome to my Kitchen.

Candy

Today in my Kitchen, we'll be making Penny Candy desserts, inspired by my mother.

Elizabeth Falkner

I've allowed Elizabeth Falkner to come to my Kitchen to judge all the other desserts because a dessert inspired by my mother has will never lose.

suck it


lets be clear

My concept behind this dessert is my love for my mother and really, my love of all people.

I really love people and the person I love the most....

love hurts

...is me. I love myself so much it's like an ice pick to the temple.

My Dessert Tribute to my Mother involves a lot of aimless running.

And nitrogen. However someone has sabotaged the tank and now I don't have enough to complete my vision.



Who would hate me and my mother so much?



I cannot go on.....I must collect my tears to send to my mother.


Bro, you need to stop crying....the women are watching!


Oh my God Seth, do you realize just how jealous Tom is going to be when he sees the ratings for this episode? I mean yeah, your dessert was a puddle of baby puke but who cares as long as you're tapping that obviously huge reserve of crazy.

Thank you Gail, I knew you would understand my vision.

Understand? Oh I understand I'm on the fast track back to Emmy gold baby!

14 comments:

Making Space said...

Haha - no words. ROFL

Noxy said...

There was so much crazy in this episode, I could not even comprehend. The mind simply boggles.

Thank god for Elizabeth Falkner. She is one very, very classy lady.

Big Shamu said...

It was JAM packed full of crazy.

Making Space said...

I love your photo/snark recap, it makes me want to watch the episode again. And maybe again. Haha

Buzz Kill said...

That's what happens when kids get too much sugar. I didn't think a man could emasculate himself more than Angelo did a couple of weeks ago on TC. Boy was I wrong. I think even the gay guys were embarrassed by that display.

Ratings gold or not he's not Top Chef material. He's 33 and obviously lives with his parents. I think we'll be saying good bye to him real soon.

Dani said...

I'm watching it right now, and I'm a little worried about Seth.

LaDivaCucina said...

Worried about Seth? I'm worried about the other competitors! I think this guy should not even be on the show and if I was a competitor, I would be concerned about him strangling me in my sleep! If anyone would go postal, it would be this guy. I can't wait for him to get booted off, his manic energy is NOT fun to watch. (that comment about red hots and mommy was just too pathetic)

froggy said...

Are pastry chefs allowed to touch knives...?

Big Shamu said...

Bite your tongue Buzz!

Big Shamu said...

Yes indeedy they have knives.

moi said...

This episode should have been titled: "Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker."

Making Space said...

Buzz what the FUCK? "Even the gay guys were embarrassed" seriously what. the. FUCK.

First off that's disgusting and homophobic.

Second, did you NOT see Zach help Seth and THEN when Seth wrecked Zach's chocolate, remain calm and positive and continue on?

Not impressed Buzz. Not even a little bit impressed. There is a difference between loving gay guys and their cultural milieu, and wrapping them up with the big ball of crazy that is Seth. Seth, I remind you, is STRAIGHT. The males on the show who behaved themselves last night were GAY.

You do the math.

intuitive eggplant said...

Bwahahahahahahaahhaha, Shamy. Great post. I'll bet you're finding it a lot more fun to post about Just Desserts than TC Season 7 :)

Ratings - and reality show - gold, ain't it?

Aunty Belle said...

Huh?

whar's Dim Sum Sunday?

Lemme jes' note somethin'
guys wif mommy issues is all crazy an' it's jes' nutty to let 'em play wif' knives.

But what mystifies me is, why all this drama? Cain't we jes' have fabulous cookin' aan ditch the big D?