This is not a Test...

This is a Level One Alert of the Federal Emergency Culinary Evaluation System. The following QuickFire Challenge has been identified as the Most Bogus Quickfire challenge in Top Chef history. For evidentiary purposes we submit the following:

Further research has determined that this man...

...Isaac McCrazyeyes doesn't know squadoosh about culinary plate appeal...

...because extensive testing has determined ashtray plating disgusts 96% of Adults (female and male) aged 18 - 65.

The Federal Emergency Culinary Evaluation System has now placed Top Chef All Stars on it's Danger to Diners Watch List. Please stay tuned for further developments.